Is it weird to hang out with a boy who is not one’s boyfriend? I have this friend, F, who I met in drawing class last term and got to be friends with during the last few weeks. He caught my eye from the beginning, because he’s cute and Asian and wears good sneakers and was obviously the only other person in the class (other than me, I mean) who wasn’t about 18. And also because his drawings were excellent.

The first time we hung out outside of class, it was to draw in the park one Sunday. Then we went for breakfast after the last class. Last week we went for coffee, which turned into lunch. And then tonight we went for dinner, which turned into coffee. Tonight’s activity included his roommate as well, who was very nice, but as he speaks limited English most of the conversation was between me and F.

Now, okay. This might be a dumb question, but is it, you know, okay to hang out in this way with another boy? Because, you see, these are DATE-LIKE activities. Dinner, coffee, afternoons in the park! Date-like! And we have excellent conversations, and lots in common. Is this okay??

E (boyfriend) is always fine when I tell him I’m meeting up with F. Not super-psyched or anything, but…fine. I’ve had this idea that we need to all hang out together, like in a big group of all of our friends, and that E and F should meet. It seems that this is the more open and honest way to go about it. I’m a little concerned about both how it looks and how E feels about it that F and I hang out alone and that he’s never met F.

I think that this would be fine had F and I always been friends, but to have a steady boyfriend and then suddenly develop another male friend seems a little more delicate. I think. But I tend not to trust my own instincts when it comes to interpersonal situations; I think my radar is a little off from being raised by such a boundary-less and dysfunctional family. So I need a little input.

Input, anyone? I welcome and appreciate any thoughts. Muchas gracias.