You guys! Oh my god. My boss is totally buying at least one of my paintings. With actual money in the form of cash and dollars and currency. Is he crazy? Only time will tell.

Yes, I did photograph it lying on a towel. I am sure I had a good reason for this but I have no idea what it was.

I am petrified that he will change his mind. He had me set the price myself, which was very difficult. I called my friend who manages a gallery.

Friend: Wow. Okay. Did you tell him you had never sold anything before?
Me: No, um, actually I told him I HAD sold something, but it was through you guys, so I didn’t know how you determined my prices.
Friend: Good! Okay, tell him that the red and blue one should be $x, and the black squares, if they make you redo it larger, should be $x + 150.
Me: Whoa, really?
Friend: Make sure you work the phrase “This is my ‘price point’ and I need to stay consistent with my gallery prices” in there.
Me: Oh, Christ.
Friend: I know. But do it. Seriously.

Yesterday I did a little pitch to my boss, including that stupid salesman-y phrase even though I felt like a jackass. He made fun of me for blushing, which made me blush even more, and then he said he would buy the red and blue one and they (he and my coworkers) would discuss some of the others. He actually said, “We would be proud (italics added by me, because, holy shit) to have your art in here. Go ahead and bring it in.” And I said, “Oh, thank you very much!” which was very professional, but then I could not control my ecstasy and I actually high-fived him, which was not. He did not seem to mind. He expects such things from me at this point, which is sort of liberating.

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Oh my god. Bush’s news conference is being broadcast on NPR and he just said something about “…and our friends, France and Europe. I mean, um, France and Germany and Britain.” At least I am more poised than Bush. (I totally just started to write “At least I am smoother than Bush” and had to delete it due to its high dirtiness quotient. However now I have included it anyway, so whatever.)

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Anyway, I am having the Best Week Ever and I should be profiled on VH1. In addition to the painting thing, my skin is really clear and I am inexplicably skinny, which is truly weird because I cancelled my gym membership three weeks ago. Furthermore, my apartment is vermin-free (knock on wood).

I am leaving you with, as my friend put it, “by far the most awesomest email from a mom ever.” Read to the end, because the awesomeness comes from the PS.

Behold:

“There is a very cool exhibit currently at the gallery near you through this Sat. I thought you might like to see it.

Yesterday’s Washington Post, front page, Style section, had a great story. Unfortunately, pictures are not included in what can be downloaded from LexisNexis as attached. (See if you can get hold of the paper?) The Web site doesn’t have links to the exhibit either.

PS. [Your 16-year-old cousin] has been suspended from school for drugs.

Love,
Mom”